"At last," the Dodo said, "everyone has won, and all must have prizes."

-Alice In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll

If you have no birthday traditions, you might start a few.

1. Other members of the family can decorate a birthday chair with crepe paper and make a crown for the honored one.

2. Every member of the family can make something for the child- a scrap book, a poem, a picture.

3. Put a gift in the same place each year-under his pillow, under his bed, under his plate.

4. Learn a new birthday song:

Oh! Jimmy, dear, we'll sing-a-ling-a-ling This little song for you.

We hope there'll be some thing-a-ling-a-ling

That we can do for you.

In autumn, winter, spring-a-ling-a-ling

And all the whole year through.

We'll sing-a-ling-a-ling

And ting-a-ling-a-ling

And sing-a-ling-a-ling for you.

(On the "ling-a-lings," you hit your water glass gently with a spoon.)

5. The child whose birthday is being celebrated gives small gifts to his brothers and sisters.

6. If your child doesn't like cake but is crazy for pancakes, put his candles on a stack of pancakes and sing to him at breakfast Or he may be a fancier of a certain kind of pie and would be happy and surprised with five candles on top of a lemon meringue.

Presents that children like do not always come from toy stores.

1. A flashlight

2. A zippered duffel bag.

3. Canteens, pup tents, and other items from surplus stores.

4. A decoy duck (from sporting goods store).

5. A 25' length of hose.

6. A hammer, saw, and a bag of nails.

7. Scratch pads, colored pencils or crayons, carbon paper and paper clips.

8. A box of Band Aids and a roll of sticky tape.

9. A stapler and a punch.

10. A box of paper cups and several packages of Kool-Aid.

11. Money.

12. A turtle, fish, or parakeet

Here are some suggestions for parties for different ages.

First year: When the baby is one year old, it is usually better for everyone if the birthday celebration is forgotten. If you feel something should be made of the occasion, some suggestions are:

1. Make a cake and put a candle on it Mother can invite all her friends and all their babies to join the festivity. Mothers can eat cake and drink coffee, while the babies totter and fall, nurse or drink milk from bottles, and mess in the cake.

2. Make a cake and put a candle on it Mother and Father can sing Happy Birthday to baby, blow out the candle, tuck baby in bed, and then eat the cake.

3. Leave the baby with a sitter or with grandmother and celebrate the occasion by going out to dinner.

Second year: If the child is in a neighborhood with a lot of other children, you can invite all the children in the neighborhood, or let older brother and sister invite their friends for cupcakes and icecream bars at three o'clock. No one is to bring the child a gift, and after the cake and ice cream have been consumed hand out balloons, and the party is over.

Third year: This is your last chance to have the birthday as you want it. You can still invite your friends and their children and include a special playmate or two from the neighborhood. The child will begin to enjoy some of the tradition of ice cream and cake and new clothes and new toys. Three-year-olds like circle and musical games suggested for them in the following chapter. Records, movies, plasticene, soap bubbles, and balloons will keep them busy and happy.

Fourth and Fifth year: There will be big talk and big plans for these birthdays. Not all children want parties. Some want to celebrate by going down town to Daddy's office and typing on his typewriter. Others want a ride on a train or a trip to the zoo, a ferryboat ride, or a picnic in the park. The privilege of staying all night with a favorite relative or friend is what some request, while others beg to eat out at a local restaurant

Parties will have taken on a prestige value. "You can't come to my Happy Birthday!" is a common threat

There is a lot to be said for the idea of having the same number of guests as the child is old; i.e. four years old, four guests. This is a fine idea except when you live in a sociable neighborhood and would have to leave someone out.

The four-or five-year-old who is giving the party can plan with Mother the guest list, the invitations, the menu, and shop for favors to give him the sense of pleasure from giving as well as getting gifts.

More and more the traditional cake and ice-cream party from three to five in the afternoon is being replaced by morning parties including lunch, or four to six parties including supper. The obvious reasons for this are: mid-morning or mid-afternoon partying spoils meals and upsets nap routines.

State on the invitation that you will bring the children home from the party. This eliminates hovering parents who come too early, or worse, those who come too late.

Even though a party is a product of civilization, it doesn't always work out that way when the participants aren't fully civilized yet.

Things That Often Happen At Birthday Parties

1. The host cannot bear it when Happy Birthday is sung to him. It is too overpowering an experience, so he hides under the table, puts his fingers in his ears, or makes loud noises.

2. You send your child to a party next door, and in five minutes he wanders home again.

3. The host greets his guests by saying, "Where's the present?"

4. The host won't let anyone touch his presents.

5. The host goes in his room and won't come out

6. Your child refuses to relinquish the present. He thinks it was for him. It may help some to explain beforehand, "This is for Sally, because it is her birthday. Sally will give you ice cream and cake."

7. Mothers try too hard to make the child perform conventionally. They often plan Pin the Tail on the Donkey and find that no one will wear the blindfold.