I had a very violent dream last night. Somebody had stolen my husband away from me. (Interesting concept, hey, how can somebody steal something that you didn't "own" in the first place?) Never mind that, the emotions were violent and so were the actions in the dream -- and I am talking about my reaction being so violent that ‘fessing up here is just too uncomfortable!

I woke up saying to myself "What the hell? And later as I was lying there allowing this book to float into my mind, "Why am I doing a dream like that? That's not who I am or who I want to be."

Now, because of young Jess's story at the beginning of the book, when I get thoughts that come up that do not fit with who I really am or who I want to be, I go into the magic questions.

So I went into "whose thoughts were they? (The answer was “mine") "What do I need to know or do about them?"

And then I got it. I got that the violence in this dream was an example for this book. Hopefully I'm way past that kind of rage but for those of you who don't know me, rage and anger have been my "black beast" that has kept me searching for a practical solution. That anger and rage was sooo ... not who I wanted to be.

And that of course, is the first step, to decide that that is not who you want to be. If rage and the violence that comes from it has been your experience, then this dream was for you.

From the simple act of deciding that rage and violence is not who you want to be, you will be manifesting the change places on the way to your dream that DO fit with who you want to be and then what you need to know or do to change it, will flow naturally.

You too, can search for and act on what I call "the early warning signals", so that the rage doesn't get a chance to come flooding up (remember how all the emotions intensify into rage when we ignore them.) At one stage my early warning signal was a tight, yucky feeling in my solar plexus, high up in my gut. At the time of editing this book, I am working on an absence of peace or joyfulness as an early warning signal that I need to ask The Questions.

So, if you are in a place where your emotions can come surging back up as rage, then you can urgently ask and act on The Questions at your first early warning signal:

1. Whose feeling is it?

2. What do you need to know or do?

3. Has it all gone yet? Has every last tiny bit of that early warning signal completely absolutely and totally gone yet? (Keep repeating the first two questions until they have)

4. And maybe, when you're ready, how does this fit with my dream?

It sounds simple because it IS simple.

The feelings are ALWAYS a communication from your soul. And your soul NEVER gives you a bum steer (that's Aussie slang for giving you the wrong information, or sending you in the wrong direction).

For me, I was staggered at how little of the anger and rage was mine. How often when I asked "Whose is it?", it was the other person's or animal's and I needed to know that in order to change what I was doing to help them reach either my dream or theirs. Very little of that anger and rage was mine at all.

My personal experience has been that as I "get it", as I understand what my soul was trying to tell me and act on that, then I no longer feel that big rage stuff (I bloody hope not ever again, because that's not who I want to be!). What happens is a lesser and much more manageable feeling, getting less and less the more I practice. And the more I practice, the easier it becomes and the less the intense the feelings become.

Although I must say that, now I know how to do this, if I ignore the milder feelings, the big, intense ones will come up pretty hard and quick and that is definitely not who I want to be!

It's turning out to be much easier to deal with them as "little feelings" or early warning signals!